This is, by far, the hardest blogpost I have ever written here in my blog. It's not gonna be long but the words I'm typing are painful words for me at the moment.
I'm not sure where to start. So many feelings and thoughts in such a short body.
Only seven months into this year and I feel like I'm already ready set and done with it. No doubt that this year has brought me some very amazing memories but right now something else is taking over. For some of you this might be a no biggie but for me, my whole world fell apart two weeks ago.
There is one thing you have been dedicating your whole life to, one thing that you love to the moon and back. You are good at it too. You spend hours and hours and hours to get better, so many hours that you put everything else a side just to be able to do this. Do I need to mention that you actually put in a lot of money too?
And then one day, someone tells you that you're not good enough and they take away what you are working your ass off for, the one thing you have dedicated your life too, the one thing you enjoy the most, the only thing you are good at(or at least supposed to be good at).
Right now. This is my reality.
I have been a part of Team Sweden since 2010 and youths before that. I have bowled 12 championships in the blue and yellow shirt.
I have an amazing offer to travel to America for the Professional Women's Bowling Association tour in August but I'm not sure I'm mentally ready and prepared for this and it breaks my heart.
What would you do?
How would you react?
And most importantly,
How do you bounce back from this?
I don't know if I'm gonna post this or not. I hate being vulnerable. I'm a fighter. I'm truly a fighter but there is only as much a person can take. Please know it takes me a lot to push that "post" button.
Be patient please. I will get back to blogging soon very soon, I promise. I just need some time.
I wanna thank everyone who has reached out to me. Your support means the world to me right now.
Swedish League Playoffs
The best weekend of swedish bowling is finally here!
Team is ready, we are on our way to Jönköping! For those of you who are close to the city please come by and watch, you're not gonna regret it. It's an event you have to experience to understand how great it is. I can already hear the drums.
If you're not able to swing by the bowl there will be live streaming, link:
Team Pergamon - BK Jösse
Team X-calibur - Skrufscha
Team Clan - Kulladal
Spader Dam - Högland
Fingers crossed for team blue, Spader Dam! 💙
bosön, 5km run and practice
The weekend was spent in stockholm at the biggest training facility in sweden. This place is pretty awesome actually, they have a school with different classes, restaurant, hotel, training facility, outdoor jogging tracks in a beautiful environment. Yes, I wish this place was closer to home.
I got to Stockholm on Friday, checked in on Facebook and thanks to that I got a dinner invite from 3 close friends who lives in stockholm. How sweet? Food was delicious and the company was great.
We arrived to Bosön on Saturday around lunch time. Started with lunch and then off to the gym. Went through a bunch of exercises they wanted us to do in the gym, lucky me I already do this type of workout - lifting weights.
After the workout we showered and got ready for a nutrition class - we were gonna make our own dinner. Healthy dishes. I liked all of it except the starter, hot carrot soup.
Main dish was salmon topped with chilisauce, lime, cashew nuts, salt and petter with a potatoes and artichoke purée. This delicious dinner was finished with a berry mascarpone. 👌 yum.
On Sunday we woke up, ate breakfast then off to the gym to do the same routine as we did on Saturday and when we were done with that we decided to play some volleyball. Had so much fun with the girls!
Ended the weekend at Bosön with lunch then off to the airport.
When I got back home I decided to go to the gym and do some interval running with incline on the treadmill. 80min later I was done with my 10km and burned 800cal.. haha I slept like a little baby after this.
-Monday I bowled the finals of the regional tournament. Bowled well but the scores were so high. Unfortunately I couldn't find a way to strike as much as the rest, I finished 7th.
-Tuesday the spontanoues me said yes to participating in a 5km run cause one of my friends colleagues got sick so they had one spot to fill. Who am I to say no to some fresh air and a good run? 😂
Today I'm very happy that I did it. Goal was 30mins for these 5km and I made it on 29:16. So proud of myself!
-Wednesday woke up with a tired body to say the least. Decided not to go to the gym today. I spent the early afternoon in the sun eating ice cream with Emily before I had to go to the bowl to pack my stuff and leave. Today me and the team went practicing in Jönköping where the swedish team nationals are being held next weekend. We had a great practice on the two patterns we are gonna bowl on - Montreal and London.
Just got home a little while ago, took a shower and now ready for some sleep. Tomorrow I have practice, gym and a coaching session. Fun stuff!
Thought I would share my instagram accounts:
my workout, bowling, daily life instagram. This is the one I update the most
Some of you may know about my creative side, some may not but here is my makeup & daily outfits instagram.
Feel free to follow!
Things just keeps getting better.
My legs are still so sore from Mondays leg work out. Why do I always push myself so hard? Haha I regret it every time I'm gonna sit down, stand up, walk etc. 😂 I just LOVE squats.
So yesterday I could barely move. I decided to take the day off from practice and working out. I went to team practice anyways to help out with bowling balls and to discuss the pattern they were bowling on. We made some progress.
Today I actually planned on going to the gym but decided to bowl a little longer instead. Practiced with Amanda on Montreal today and it still surprises me how good it feels to bowl. From the bottom of my heart I really enjoy it right now.
And it got even better when I received a phone call with the news that I got the job I applied for!! I was on a job interview this week, i was so nervous, you have no idea! But obv it worked out pretty good. :) I will sign some papers in two weeks and after that I will tell you all about it 👌
evening was spent with mom, we made dinner and she surprised me with a Nutella mud cake. Oh dear god it was delicious.
So good just hanging out with her tonight. Good food, good wine, good company. No better way to celebrate.
Ready for bed now.
Gotta get up early and get ready to ✈ to Stockholm for a weekend with team sweden at Bosön.
A big fat thank you goes out to my mom who always supports me, believes in me and is always there for me. it has been going on for quite a while that i have been doubting myself on and off the lanes but this girl is not here to give up. I decided to turn things around, worked hard on the lanes, physically in the gym and mentally at home and yesterday it finally paid off. I dared to go out on the lanes to bowl one shot at a time, to believe in myself and to enjoy it. the result: 1482 (with 8 per game) and leading the regional tournament. Here's to never giving up! I couldnt have done it without my number one idol in the world, my mom and of course my dear beloved IQ Tour and Optimus 😀 gosh. Going to bed with a huge smile. Finals on monday, wish me luck!
Q: any good tips for bowling clothes?
A: Let's see.
When I bowl I prefer wearing stretchy skirts or shorts/pants. My favorite skirt is out team outfit, it's a tennis skirt. I don't know where it's from but here are a few suggestions below:
Or some of my favorite shorts/skirts from Röhnisch
Golf clothing or Tennis clothing are perfect for us bowlers. :)
I got back home Vimmerby on Monday. Went straight to the gym for a squat-party then off to the bowl for house league. Unfortunately my team mates never showed up so I couldn't bowl. Yes. I was grumpy about it.
Tuesday I woke up, laced up my running shoes and went out in the beautiful weather. Stair workout to warm up then pw/run down to the beach and back. I have never ran on the beach before and damn it sucks Hahaha. Good workout for the legs for sure. 1,5h later I was home again, showered, got dressed and made some food. Had to get ready for practice.
Yesterday's practice was actually better than expected. I worked on my release, to get more side on the ball cause lately I have been so much up the back. Good feeling actually. Gonna keep working on that tonight with mom.
Later: gym? practice and work
So proud of the young talented guys I coach back home. Today they finished first and second at the last practice/tournament of the south region.
Nice job guys!!
it's been forever AGAIN. I'm just enjoying life to the fullest. I had a rough time a few weeks ago but thanks to the amazing people I'm blessed to call my friends, I'm happy again.
I'm back in the gym, kicking ass. Trying out some new products that is gonna help me get my body the vitamins and stuff that I need. Looking forward to see what it can do for me.
Also working a little, lucky me I can do it on distance too. ✌
So what else has happened?
I'm right now in Vimmerby visiting my best friend. Had an unreal Friday watching her trying on wedding dresses and go through the plans for THE day. So happy for her.
As I said. Enjoying life. Weather is starting to get better in Sweden too. Spending this afternoon in the backyard in the sun, working on that tan ;) hahahaha jk. But it's actually warm. So I'm gonna keep doing this for a little while and I will get back to you tomorrow when I'm home again and in the gym.
Lots of love
And thanks for being patient people X
Leta reflect över the weekend. Well spare practice gave results.
I don't think there is something wrong with my physical game. I believe I need to work on my mental game. Cause I can bowl sooo freaking good in practice but when I step out on the lanes during a competition my head just blocks. I tend to focus on everything and everyone else instead of just myself and my own bowling. Like I'm afraid of succeeding. I just put too much pressure that it's not even fun anymore.
Don't get me wrong, it is fun, I love bowling, but when you're so focused on what not to do, that's when you fail.
Time to focus more on the mental game.
Anyone have any suggestions of books etc?
Other than bowling I'm finally back in the gym after having a terrible cold. Leg day yesterday with one of my friends in the military haha. Guess what? I'm sore today! Haha
Getting ready for a new session at the gym with Rebecca. Later on is coaching session, bowling practice and work 👌
swedish elite championship
Yesterday was a very long day.
I drove for 4,5h to get to Örebro where this year's swedish elite championship is held.
So what is this tournament?
In Sweden we have two types of swedish championships. One is more for the amateur bowler and one is for the elite bowlers. The amateur one is 22 different classes, depending on average, age and gender. The elite championships top 16 qualifies of the overall ranking of the year and then another 8 spots is open to another qualifying where anyone can bowl.
Qualifying, for those 8 spots, bowled on Athens pattern. It took 1520/8 to make it through.
24 ladies bowl first and second squad on Stockholm 34ft and Tokyo 43ft. Nina bowled very well and is now leading on 2746/12. Top 16 made it through for today's 3 pattern and the cut was 2389/12.
I'm sitting 9th with 2482/12. I was not close to striking as much as the other girls were on the short pattern. I have two games that I really struggled in. Game 4 i just couldnt get the last pin out. 9pin twice, 10pin twice, 4 pin and 7 pin. Just can't afford that when some of the girls are killing it with 1480's.
The longer pattern was a little bit better. The scores were lower but also made it harder to catch up.
It was a long day as I said. Drove for 4,5h. Bowled for 6h. And ate alot. That's pretty much all I did.
I got a somewhat good night's sleep. My body is tired and sore but feeling alright. Today is a new day and a new pattern. It's all or nothing, top 8 makes is through to tonight's round Robin. We are bowling on Montreal next!
"make your spares"
Yesterday was one of the best days in a very long time on the lanes. I litterally enjoyed every second of it. The first hour I was working on my push away, ballmotion away and tried a few balls that I haven't bowled with much lately. Ended my practice session with 40 spareshots, 20shots on 1 pin left and 20shots with two pins left. 39/40. Stupid 3-9 ruined my 100% 😣
Close! Still a good session.
When I was done my brother came to me and asked if I could sub, we have a 50+ tour event in our bowling center and someone cancelled 45min before the squad. I said yes. I mean why not?
Good decision since I bowled very well. Pattern was Seoul and I bowled 1420 with my Asylum and IQ Tour solid. Too bad my scores didn't count ;)
Also went over my bowling balls, made sure everything is set for the weekend. Packed my bags. Or at least my bowling bags. Need to get my clothes together. Aaaaaa so boring.
Oh well leaving tomorrow for Örebro and swedish Elite championships. Tough weekend coming up. 3 different patterns. I will tell you more about it tomorrow.
The last two days of practice has been focus on speed. How to increase my speed and also decrease.
This can be a bit tricky. What I tend to do wrong when I increase my speed is to not be quick enough in my push away. I need to be more aggressive from the start and just go with it. Normally to increase my speed I move back on the approach to get a longer distance to the foul line. This forces me to take longer/faster steps.
What I wanna do is move back on the approach, straighter start position as in not bending my knees that much to get higher from the floor (think loft) and also be aggressive in my push away.
So when I do the opposite, decrease my speed, I move up the approach. Normally I do a 5 steps approach but when I wanna decrease my speed increase choose to do a 4 steps approach instead. Why? Cause it feels more natural for me. I can still be "aggressive" but with a lower ball speed.
I need to remind myself not to drop my right shoulder though. What I wanna do here is 4 steps with more bend knees than normally to get lower in my body/swing, feel relaxed, open up my shoulders to be able to open up the lane.
What to do tomorrow on the lanes?
So yesterday I met up with one of my friends, she is going to help me out with a project I'm doing right now. We took some fun photos and today I got a sneakpeak of two photos.
Pretty cool huh? Look at my chubby cheeks! Hahaha. I can't tell you yet what it is but hopefully this is gonna help me make my pwba - dream come true.
Can't wait to see the rest!